FICTION

Have You Ever Been a Paramecium?

This game isn’t working

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Paramecium.jpg#/media/File:Paramecium.jpg Permission is granted to copy, distribute and/or modify this document under the terms of the GNU Free Documentation License, Version 1.2 or any later version published by the Free Software Foundation

“Have you ever been a Paramecium? Or any one-celled animal? Have you?”

Beorn glared at the other directors. “Have you?”, he barked again.

The Chairman sighed deeply. “It’s an experience. It’s an experience many find quite interesting.”:

“And that nobody ever wants to repeat!” Beorn snapped back.

“We have to do something.” Beorn looked around the simulated table, but no one met his eyes.

“We are losing business. Our competitors are killing us with the Fantasy worlds. Our laissez-faire is not working, the game is falling apart at the seams. We need to kill it and roll it back a few hundred years. A restart.”

A few people cleared their throats as though they were going to speak, but then seemed to reconsider. Silence blanketed the virtual room.

“Did any of you read my status reports?”

Again, no eyes would meet his. The Chairman was looking up at the ceiling.

Frustrated, Beorn slammed the table. “It’s falling apart. They’ve polluted the world, they are constantly on the brink of war, they kill each other as though it were a fantasy world. This isn’t working!”