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Life Hacks for Retirement
Don’t go quietly into that good night
Shower between 9 and 10 am; the water pressure is better. But if you aren’t going out, why shower at all? Or get dressed? It saves on laundry.
Shop mid-week when the stores are less crowded. Advanced shopping tip: you don’t need to shower for Walmart, and you barely need to get dressed. Do wear shoes, though; they get picky about that.
Become indignant if the cashiers don’t offer your senior discount. Be equally indignant if they do mention the senior discount — but take it. Become outraged if the store doesn’t have any senior discounts at all. How dare they!
Practice saying “whippersnapper”. Opportunities are not frequent; you need to be ready when they come.
Don’t worry about cleaning out the house so as not to leave a mess for the kids to go through. They’ll just send a big truck to take it all to the dump. Birds and rats will sort through it.
When you take your pills, snap a photo with your phone, then delete it. When you can’t remember if you took your pills, check your deleted photos. If it’s there, you might have taken them. If you need to be more certain, put the pills on your tongue and take that picture.
