Somewhere I wrote about how I cried when I had to fire employees to save my business and that there was nothing certain about its survival. I'm not going to drop a link because I don't do that and I'm too lazy to look for it and the TL;DR version is just that I understand the pain.

My wife wasn't involved with the business, so while she saw my pain and had deep empathy, she wasn't crushed by it. She probably also felt that we'd survive, which we did.

But I know what it is like to sit in a dark room in the middle of the night while guilt, anger, and remorse gnaw at your core.